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Are you a social butterfly?

I am not exactly a social butterfly, but more a wallflower who hides from those she wishes to stay away from. Ever since I was young, I never really felt the need to add anything to social gatherings. I was always the one to either hide (if I didn’t like the guests that were coming over) or the one that simply stayed quiet, observed and reflected. The only time I was less quiet is when my sisters and massi’s (aunts) came around. That’s when I would happily wander around the house – lighting candles in every corner of the house and make chai (tea) and food for everyone, whilst enjoying their presence and snuggling in between them.

Of course, being shy played a huge role in my social behaviour, but even after I managed to overcome my shyness, I rarely felt like engaging in conversations. It wasn’t until I was 28 that I was able to have an “empty” hi, hello, lovely weather type of conversation – before that I would just stay awkwardly quiet (this is something which often makes me giggle when I think back).

The truth is that I find it hard to talk about things that do not matter, or to talk about other people and their lives. A lot of people, for example, find it interesting to figure out what other people are doing, what kind of work they are doing etc. how many degrees they have and much more. Yet, it is not something I enjoy discussing, because it doesn’t say anything about the individual, but more about his or her labels. Of course, just like asking someone what the weather is like and how they are doing, asking about one’s career or education is just another social question we learn to ask and take interest in. However, if it was up to me, I’d rather speak about self-development, learn about new philosophical teachings, read Rumi’s work, listen to Saints and Mystics.. speak about something that has value and can help me grow or otherwise sit together in silence and soak in the energy of His remembrance.

It saddens me to see families that spend all their lives together in vain. Merely out of attachment, out of habit and social obligations (and/or cultural traditions/values). Moreover, missing each other madly and having to speak to each other all the time – has become a symbol of what we believe to be love. But is it really? Why does loving one’s family or friends can only be proven, when you miss them, call them all the time, visit them all the time etc. and only follow what they do and/or think. For example, in a lot of traditional families, children are told off for being different, having different perspectives or preferences. But why do we need to be the same, to show that we love others?

Recently, we were visiting a family who kept repeating how important it is to miss your family, how they miss their children when they are away and pray daily that they return etc. After sharing their emotions for one hour, they turned to me and asked me if I don’t miss my parents and family, since I live abroad. Now, ideally, I should have said ‘yes, I do’, so that they could move on with their conversation in peace. However, being the anti-social wallflower that I am, I wasn’t able to do that and had to (awkwardly) share my philosophical views of life. This obviously resulted in a few moments of silence, before they quickly spoke about something else.

Even though, I never said, I don’t miss my parents and family, they somehow felt that, that was exactly what I meant haha. My family with God’s grace is very relaxed, my parents have never really been very demanding. We call each other every other day, but there is never a must to call – we simply call, whenever we feel like it. We meet each other, whenever we can, but at the same time, they understand my responsibilities abroad and don’t mind it if I can’t come. This doesn’t mean we don’t miss each other, but we have given each other mutual freedom and respect each other’s journey.

In the end, that is what life is about: to experience every moment, to utilise every second of life in a good manner – to purify one self, to reflect and focus on self-development. It is to move beyond the known (that which we grow up with), to leave the nest and explore life beyond our comfort zone. And this is exactly why having a family is a blessing, for it is a secure space, which we can connect to whenever we need it, to learn from our wise elders, to rejuvenate and re-energise, to heal ourselves or to fill ourselves with love and light. However, if we use that same space, to imitate our forefathers and do what we see around us, without questioning it or making it our own, then what’s the point of being alive? For even the act of breathing won’t be an individual experience, but something we merely copied.

This is one of the reasons, why I often question the company of those who sit together in vain. Who stick to traditions that go against humanity, who are focused on pride, whilst putting others down. (Think about the caste system, cultural traditions etc.) What is the purpose of being together, of being part of a large family or community, when the only purpose is to move in the exact same manner: the way they learned it from their families, without questioning or wondering whether they believe in the things they do or say. What is the point of meeting one another, when nothing but negative energy and ignorant words are shared? What is the point of maintaining such social responsibilities, when your presence cannot help or elevate another soul? Or to follow your family’s traditions or religion – without receiving the opportunity to experience religion and God yourself? We don’t always have to have ‘wise’ conversations, but it surely is our responsibility to not speak in vain, to think about our actions and to manage our energy in a good manner. After all, when our mind is engrossed in negativity – then that is exactly what we gift to our surroundings.

With my love & light,

Reshma

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Gurdjieff’s Advices to his Daughter

❤ Beautiful reminders by Gurdjieff to his daughter❤

  1. Fix your attention on yourself.
  2. Be conscious at every moment of what you are thinking, feeling, desiring, and doing.
  3. Always finish what you have begun.
  4. Whatever you are doing, do it as well as possible
  5. Do not become chain yourself to anything that can destroy you in the course of time.
  6. Develop your generosity without witnesses.
  7. Treat everyone as if he or she was a close relative.
  8. Put order in what you have put in disordered.
  9. Learn to receive, give thanks for every gift.
  10. Stop defining yourself.
  11. Do not lie or steal, for you lie to yourself and steal from yourself.
  12. Help your neighbour, but do not make him dependent.
  13. Do not wish that others imitate you.
  14. Make work plans and accomplish them.
  15. Do not take up too much space.
  16. Make no useless movements or sounds.
  17. If you lack faith, pretend to have it.
  18. Do not allow yourself to be impressed by strong personalities.
  19. Do not regard anyone or anything as your possession.
  20. Share fairly.
  21. Do not seduce.
  22. Sleep and eat only as much as necessary.
  23. Do not speak of your personal problems.
  24. Do not express judgment or criticism when you are ignorant of most of the factors involved.
  25. Do not establish useless friendships.
  26. Do not follow fashions.
  27. Do not sell yourself.
  28. Respect the contracts you have signed.
  29. Be on time.
  30. Never envy the luck or success of anyone.
  31. Say no more than necessary.
  32. Do not think of the profits your work will engender.
  33. Never threaten anyone.
  34. Keep your promises.
  35. In any discussion, put yourself in the other person’s place.
  36. Admit that someone else may be superior to you.
  37. Do not eliminate, but transmute.
  38. Conquer your fears, for each of them represents a camouflaged desire.
  39. Help others to help themselves.
  40. Conquer your aversions and come closer to those who inspire rejection in you.
  41. Do not react to what others say about you, whether praise or blame.
  42. Transform your pride into dignity.
  43. Transform your anger into creativity.
  44. Transform your greed into respect for beauty.
  45. Transform your envy into admiration for the values of the other.
  46. Transform your hate into charity.
  47. Neither praise nor insult yourself.
  48. Regard what does not belong to you as if it did belong to you.
  49. Do not complain.
  50. Develop your imagination.
  51. Never give orders to gain the satisfaction of being obeyed.
  52. Pay for services performed for you.
  53. Do not proselytize your work or ideas.
  54. Do not try to make others feel for you emotions such as pity, admiration, sympathy, or complicity.
  55. Do not try to distinguish yourself by your appearance.
  56. Never contradict; instead, be silent.
  57. Do not contract debts; acquire and pay immediately.
  58. If you offend someone, ask his or her pardon; if you have offended a person publicly, apologize publicly.
  59. When you realize you have said something that is mistaken, do not persist in error through pride; instead, immediately retract it.
  60. Never defend your old ideas simply because you are the one who expressed them.
  61. Do not keep useless objects.
  62. Do not adorn yourself with others ideas.
  63. Do not have your photograph taken with famous people.
  64. Justify yourself to no one, and be your own judge.
  65. Never define yourself by what you possess.
  66. Never speak of yourself without considering that you might change.
  67. Accept that nothing belongs to you.
  68. When someone asks your opinion about something or someone, speak only of his or her qualities.
  69. When you become ill, regard your illness as your teacher, not as something to be hated.
  70. Look directly into the eyes, and do not hide yourself.
  71. Do not forget your dead ones, but accord them a limited place and do not allow them to invade your life.
  72. Wherever you live, always find a space that you devote to the sacred.
  73. When you perform a service, make your effort inconspicuous.
  74. If you decide to work to help others, do it with pleasure.
  75. If you are hesitating between doing and not doing, take the risk of doing.
  76. Do not try to be everything to your spouse; accept that there are things that you cannot give him or her but which others can.
  77. When someone is speaking to an interested audience, do not contradict that person and steal his or her audience.
  78. Live on the money you have earned.
  79. Never brag about amorous adventures.
  80. Never glorify your weaknesses.
  81. Never visit someone only to pass the time.
  82. Obtain things in order to share them.
  83. If you are meditating and a devil appears, make that devil meditate too.
(Shared by SufiWay)
Which one(s) do you like the most?
(Gurdjieff was an influential early 20th-century mystic, philosopher & spiritual teacher).

THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS FAILURE

The notion of Failure and Success according to mystics throughout time, is something that is manmade, it was created as an idea or thought in someone’s mind and slowly became part of society through the ego’s clever ways.

There is no such thing as failure. Failure is an idea because success is also a stupid idea. Instead of trying to change the world, change the idea. If you just change that, everything is great. (Sadhguru)

What made us think that being a doctor is more praiseworthy or ‘special’ compared to a cleaner or a homemaker? Why do we seem to respect those who are rich, more than those who own nothing but a few garments. Why is having a Master Degree better, than being able to paint or dance? Why do we value ‘fashion icons’ more than Saints and Divine Teachers?

Every idea, thought, emotion or value that you have is picked up from somewhere and it rules you from within. It is somebody else’s idea of what success is. Don’t become a slave to somebody’s idea; that is the first and foremost success. (Sadhguru)

It is really time to change our standards and start to show our appreciation for everyone.

Having money, owning a house or a car and having multiple degrees from Top Universities, DO NOT make you an Honourable or Respectable Human Being. Be filled with Love, Compassion and being Responsible, by living life in a Conscious Manner, is what makes one a respectable and honourable human being. Therefore, we should all focus on polishing our inner world again. Purifying the heart and mind. Purifying our energy – and focus on sending positive, healing love and light to the world at all times.

Your negative thoughts, your anger, your sadness, no matter what your reason is – are poison. They poison you, your surroundings – they pollute the entire world.

Are you aware of your own pollution? If so, when will you consciously make a change?

Even if you are not a doctor, but you believe there is success and failure, and therefore you are striving to be something, become someone. You believe one should have degrees or no one will take you serious – than you are still contributing to the deceptive illusions of this world. And I know it is hard, I know it is not easy. Yes, indeed, we need money to survive, and most companies demand you have certain papers etc. However, this shouldn’t stop us from trying to change the system, from re-educating ourselves and our loved ones – and this definitely shouldn’t make us scared and enrol us into today’s rat race.

So LOVE EVERYONE – especially your teachers, our Saints, Mystics and Prophets. Being a homemaker, an artist of any kind, whether you make money or not, being a cleaner, or a construction worker is amazing! Without any of us, this world wouldn’t be able to function. We wouldn’t have houses, streets, clean neighbourhoods, bright children who can become tomorrow’s hope, without those who pray for the world, we wouldn’t have positive energy to nourish us: we would be left with a bunch of selfish individuals, a world full of greed and negative pollution that would slowly destruct the entire Universe.

Be The Change – Change Your Perception Consciously ! Live in a Conscious Manner

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Prepare Yourself For The Cold Weather

🍁🍂 Nature’s Most Powerful Antibiotics❤
Make sure you have them at home, since the weather is changing now. 🍁🍂

Apple cider vinger, ginger, turmeric, oregano oil and honey are my favorites amongst these! ❤️❤️

Whenever I feel I am getting a cold or the flu, I make a mixture of luke warm water, lemon and apple cider vinegar (just a little). I noticed that it does not only help me to heal when I am getting ill, but it also prevents me from getting ill. Normally I am quite sensitive when someone in my surroundings has the flu. Whenever, my husband gets unwell for example, I am bound to follow! However, this time around, I didn’t get ill at all (All Praise goes to God – Alhamdu’lillah). Even when he had a really bad flu that didn’t want to leave him, I managed to stay fine!

Essential oils are also wonderful, so do read up on it and figure out what suits you and what doesn’t. Moreover, it would also be good to try out homeopathic remedies, whenever you are down with something. I have been using it for all of my issues for the past 2 years and it really has done wonders for me!! Last year for example, I somehow caught this stubborn flu that would return every 2-3 weeks – but after using homeopathic remedies, it finally left me completely!

Educate Yourself & Your Loved Ones

Much love and light,
Reshma

🍁🍂

PS. Do ask for advice if you are not sure how to use these remedies. Home Remedies and herbs are definitely NOT dangerous, but in order to make sure that you use them in the right manner and that they assist you to enhance your health – it is important to know how to use it, when to use it etc. Nature’s healing magic is very profound – if only we educate ourselves❤

 

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Daily Prayer Circle (5 minutes)

 From Monday (7th of November 2016) We will have a Daily Prayer Circle.

This means that, every evening (for two weeks), at 7 PM (UK time), we will pray together for 5 minutes. It doesn’t matter where you are or what you are doing. For just 5 minutes, stop your work and pray for the wellbeing of all.

There are absolutely no requirements or guidelines regarding our Prayer Circle. You may choose to
– Sit quietly and convey your prayers
– Meditate for a few moments
– Send healing light to the world
– Recite your Zikr
– Chanting Mantras or Sing Devotional Songs
– Light a candle
– Or just hold the intention of sending loving vibrations to the entire world. In the end, our intention is all that matters.

The main point is that we choose to do this together
When prayer is done collectively, the energy of that prayer is much stronger and multiplied many times. Moreover, prayer together, will not only lift our own vibrations and energy, but also the energy in our house (environment) and the energy of our loved ones!

So join our prayer circle every evening, for a 2 week trial. Remember, our words, thoughts and energy make a huge difference in the world. When we are calm and relaxed, our environment will be as beautiful, when we send out stressful thoughts and negative energy, our environment will be the same. At the moment, the world really needs our love and help. So let us join hands and pray together

**More than 200 controlled experiments in humans, plants, animals, and even microbes, suggest that COMPASSIONATE, LOVING PRAYERS and intentions of one individual can affect another individual or object at great distances. (Thich Nhat Hanh)

 

Time for our Daily Prayer Circle is:

7.00 PM (UK time) 

 

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The Universe Doesn’t Need Our Likes or Comments – It Needs Our Prayers & Love

❤ Don’t Forget to Pray for the Entire Universe Today❤
To pray for those at Standing Rock..
For Our Native Indian Brothers & Sisters
For Those in Need,
For Our Brothers and Sisters who suffer from acts of war,
For Those who are dealing with Mental or Physical Health Issues .. For Those who are Sad and Depressed..
For Those who are Hurt and Heartbroken..
For All of Humanity..
For all our Animal Friends
For Mother Nature.. For all of His creations..<3

Just take a few minutes to think about all of them, send them your love, your light and healing.. Pray for them.

The Universe doesn’t need our likes (or dislikes), our comments, our sadness or anger. The Universe needs our positive energy, our love and prayers. It is in our hands.

❤ Jummah Mubarak – Blessed Friday❤

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November: Month of Responsibility & Forgiveness

For the last few months, the main theme in my life revolves around taking Ownership and Responsibility of my mind, thoughts, feelings, and actions. Something I have addressed a lot in my previous posts: explaining the need to take responsibility of our actions, in order to protect mother earth, our animal friends and our global family. 

However, this month seems to take it a step further, guiding me towards taking responsibility of every single moment and event which has happened, is happening or will happen in the future: basically the way I perceive and experience life. Unfortunately, as human beings, we have a tendency to blame other people, things or situations. Whatever doesn’t go according to our expectations, likes/dislikes or wishes, and ends up making us feel ‘less pleasant’ is something we blame upon external forces: there is always something (or someone) that is responsible for our feelings, emotions, or behaviour.

Sadhguru, questions in his book Inner Engineering: 

Who is responsible? Who is responsible for the way you are right now? Your genes? Your Father? Your Mother, Your wife? Your husband? Your teacher? Your boss? Your mother-in-law? God? The Government? Or all of the above?

He continues explaining that, upon asking why people are in a certain condition, they almost always have a fitting response of who or what caused it. (Example: Pat says: “you know when I was a child, my parents…”. The same old story, Sadhguru writes, but just with a few variations. Human beings according to him, have collectively refined the old blame game into a fine art. 

Even though, it might be true that unfortunate events, negative individuals and experiences might affect us on a deep level – the CHOICE to allow it to affect us and to perceive it as something that is happening to us and thus becomes us, is our own individual choice. One of my Beloved Saints and Spiritual Teachers in India always used to say – when someone says something negative to you, it is your choice to accept it (or not). Thus, next time someone throws negative energy at you, simply do not catch the ball. Let it go past you! And this is so true. When we experience things, we ‘catch it’ and say this is done to me and now has become part of me – we then continue to carry the heavy luggage of accumulated past experiences, feelings, pain and thoughts for the rest of our lives – until our life energy departs. Rather than nourishing ourselves with pure energy and wisdom, we rather dwell in yesterday’s memory lane, re-chewing all the old tales we once experienced. 

“The quality of our lives is determined by our ability to respond to the varied complex situations that we encounter.

If the ability to respond with intelligence, competence, and sensitivity is compromised by compulsive or reactive approach, we are enslaved by the situation. It means we have allowed the nature of our life experience to be determined by our circumstances, not by us.”  (Sadhguru)

Osho, in addition once said that, we all react based on our past experiences. For example: if someone has once tricked you in business, the next time you find a business opportunity, you will automatically be suspicious and respond in a much more ‘closed’ manner – to protect yourself from experiencing it again. Which means, we are responding in a compulsive, reactive approach. 

Taking ownership of our life means that we have to move beyond the accumulation of our senses, beyond memory, beyond our body (which is just an accumulation of food) – and to understand that YOU are not your mind (your experiences), you are not that which has been conveyed to you by your parents, teachers, society, the world etc. You are not the body, your cultural identity, your qualities, your degrees – none of the labels that worldly life has placed upon your being. You are beyond all of that, beyond all that you have gathered throughout this life time (feelings, experiences, emotions, food, teachings, thoughts, the body). Being alive, means being conscious, which moves beyond our body, beyond the mind – that merges with the entire universe – somewhere there, you will find YOU. 

“The physical and Psychological dimensions belong to the realm of polarities: Pain – Pleasure, Love – Hate, Masculine – Feminine and so on. If you have one, the other is bound to follow. But when you move into the fundamental dimension of who you are, you are beyond polarities. You become blissful by your own nature. You are the master of your own destiny. It is time to reclaim for ourselves, the extraordinary transformative power of this single world: Responsibility. Apply it to your life, and watch the magic unfold.” (Sadhguru) 

Right there, between the two extremes (polarities) of good and bad, negative and positive etc. we will find the middle path.

  “Thus we have made of you a community justly balanced” (al-Baqarah 2:143) a community of the Middle Path. (Islam, Sufism)

Sunyata (the middle way) emptiness, that transcends the extremes of existence and non-existence. (Mahayana Buddhism)

Therefore, it is important that we all take responsibility for our lives, not just our actions but also for our inner self and not blame our situations or feelings on outer matters. 

“Whenever we have to do something about OUR lives, we have taken it into our hands. Whenever it comes to other people’s misfortunes, we have a word to explain it: destiny.

Destiny has become a popular scapegoat, a way to deal with failure, a fatalistic ruse to reconcile ourselves to all kinds of uncomfortable situations.

But turning inward is the first step from passivity to agency – from being a victim toward become a master of your own destiny.” (Sadhguru) 

Moreover, taking responsibility simply means: “your ability to respond. All it requires is for you to realise that you are responsible for all that you are and all that you are not, all that may happen to you and all that may not happen to you. (…). Your physical existence is possible only because of your body’s seamless ability to respond to the entire universe. If your body wasn’t responding, you wouldn’t be able to exist for a moment. However, taking responsibility is not a convenient philosophy to reconcile you to the way things are.. Nor does it mean to accept blame, instead of assigning it. It simply means consciously responding to the situation. Once you take responsibility, you will invariable start exploring ways to address the situation. You will look for solutions.” (Sadhguru)

Forgiveness: Forgiveness is an integral aspect of taking responsibility, because the moment you realise that you are the reason why things happen(ed) in your life, there will be nothing left to blame anymore. This is not only important to release the heavy emotions and feelings we have accumulated over the years (and thus to free our being), but also because it is said that, whomever you hold a grudge towards (or simply cannot forgive) will remain connected to you karmically. 

“Blame, grudges, judgement, hopelessness and depression are all symptoms of an inability to forgive. (…)

We hide behind the bad parents that did not love us the way they should have, or the boss that never saw our potential and wasted years of our talents, or the relationship that never gave us what we wanted, or all those that took advantage of us without the proper honour, payment or acknowledgement. (…)

These are all the logjams in our psyches that are keeping us at a lower vibration and from being free to move forward.” (Lena Stevens) 

So let us take responsibly for our own selves: for life, our body, our thoughts/energy, and for our soul – through forgiveness, mindfulness and living consciously. By doing so, the world as it is, could transform into heaven, within moments – for we no longer live in polarities, but have transcended beyond the illusionary matters of the mind. 

With my love and light,
Reshma